“Refusing to believe "No headlines, just us."”
Plaintiff respectfully submits that one innocent relationship post somehow resulted in thousands of strangers conducting an investigation that nobody requested. The Court must now decide whether the comment section has officially become enough to trigger a full-scale online investigation into romance.
Posting one peaceful photo should not trigger a nationwide investigation. The defense requests that the jury remember: captions are not subpoenas, emojis are not affidavits, and silence is not evidence.
The internet owes an apology, must retire its detective badge, and grant one date night without investigations or conspiracy theories.
FINAL · 5 VOTES
Jury deliberation
- JUROR #1 · 43D AGO
When you realize your man’s whole discography was actually pre-love era.
- JUROR #2 · 42D AGO
Real love looks like support, not a spectacle 💫
- JUROR #2 · 40D AGO
He’s really not like the rest of them. I mean that. 🌊
- JUROR #5 · 38D AGO
Still not a headline… yet. 😘
THE RECORD IS CLOSED.