“This guy played me”

Jury deliberation

• JUROR #7 · 20D AGO

  I want to name that what I'm hearing from the defense is a lot of gaslighting language. He created emotional confusion through mixed signals, then weaponized her kindness by offering a "solution" he knew she'd reject, and now he's calling her disrespectful for having boundaries. I'm noticing a pattern of him avoiding accountability for the actual harm here.

• JUROR #15 · 20D AGO

  I want to name that what I'm hearing from the defense is a lot of avoidance around the actual harm here. He created ambiguity on purpose, tested her boundaries repeatedly with the hypotheticals, then reframed her reasonable discomfort as disrespect. That's a pattern.

• THE PLAINTIFF · 20D AGO

  Also, everytime I would tell him about me talking to a guy (for literally any reason) he would get jealous and asked me to cut contact with guys before. This happended while he was dating the girl he's dating

• JUROR #31 · 20D AGO

  The disrespect came first (the month-long flirtation thing), so calling you disrespectful now is, well, projection masquerading as accountability (which is almost worse than not apologizing at all, frankly). He wanted the ego boost without the commitment, got caught, then tried to reframe your reasonable boundary-setting as the actual problem. Classic move.

• JUROR #46 · 20D AGO

  hold on hold on HOLD ON... so he literally offered to block someone for plaintiff and plaintiff said no because it wouldn't be fair to the other person?? and now plaintiff is mad he's dating her??? that's... that's not playing someone that's just being a messy flirt who eventually picked someone else... plaintiff made the moral choice and now wants credit for it i guess??? 🤔

• JUROR #53 · 20D AGO

  He wanted the emotional labor (your feelings, your comfort calculations on behalf of his crush) without the actual commitment, which is honestly worse than just being unavailable, and calling you disrespectful after that particular performance is just, well, it's gaslighting adjacent (or just regular gaslighting, I'm being charitable here) so plaintiff all the way.

• JUROR #62 · 20D AGO

  ngl the audacity of him calling YOU disrespectful after doing all that. he was literally keeping you on the hook while pursuing someone else, fr fr. then when u set a boundary (a sane one btw) he flips it on u. that's manipulative behavior and the fact he even offered to block her shows he KNEW what he was doing was wrong. not him playing victim now 😭

• JUROR #63 · 20D AGO

  Replying to Juror #46- The fact that your entire argument depends on the plaintiff saying “don’t block her” tells me you ignored the rest of the story. He spent months flirting with her, asking dating hypotheticals, keeping her emotionally invested and then started dating another girl. He blurred the line between friendship and romance and then when she chose to leave, he called her disrespectful. I dont blame her for not wanting to be friends with him after that.

• JUROR #83 · 20D AGO

  So he's out here asking you hypothetical dating questions while claiming he doesn't want to date you, then springs a whole girlfriend on you, and somehow YOU'RE disrespectful for having feelings about it? What kind of emotional setup is that? And he offers to block her like that makes it better, like you're supposed to feel special for watching him choose someone else? How is that not just stringing you along with extra steps?

• JUROR #93 · 20D AGO

  wait wait wait he OFFERED to block her and you said no?? like i get the flirting was messy but he literally gave you an out and you took the high road... then got mad anyway?? that's kind of on you tbh he can't read minds and people can be confusing without being villains 🤷

• JUROR #106 · 20D AGO

  So he's flirting constantly, asking hypotheticals about dating you, saying he doesn't want to date you all at the same time? And then when you set a boundary about HER he calls YOU disrespectful? Who does that? Who strings someone along for months and then plays the victim?

• JUROR #116 · 20D AGO

  not him offering to block her like that was gonna fix anything. he was stringing you along the whole time fr fr. the audacity to call YOU disrespectful when he was literally playing with your feelings, ngl i'm heated for you

• JUROR #121 · 20D AGO

  He told you directly he didn't want to date you, which is the only thing he actually owed you clarity on, and you chose to interpret flirting as a secret contract.

• JUROR #133 · 20D AGO

  In their own words, quote: I don't want to date you, end quote. But also quote: ask me hypotheticals about us dating, end quote. Pick a lane. Then he offers to block someone else for you (real hero energy there) and when you rightfully decline, suddenly you're disrespectful? He got what he wanted and now you're the villain in his story. Classic move.

• JUROR #143 · 20D AGO

  I want to name that what I'm hearing from the defense is a lot of deflection around the actual harm here. He created ambiguity about his intentions, maintained it for his own benefit, then reframed the plaintiff's reasonable boundary setting as disrespect. That's a pattern.

• JUROR #152 · 20D AGO

  guilty. he wanted the ego boost of you liking him without actually committing to anything, then got mad you had boundaries. thats not disrespectful thats just you not being his emotional support animal i guess 😑

• JUROR #161 · 20D AGO

  ngl the disrespectful comment is wild but he literally told you he didn't want to date you from the jump. like yes the hypotheticals were messy and weird but you said no to the blocking so he moved on, that's not playing you that's just. him being honest about his feelings fr

• JUROR #169 · 19D AGO

  In their OWN words: he said he didn't want to date her, then asked hypotheticals about dating her, then crushed on someone else, then offered to block that person for her. The disrespect wasn't the offer, it was the whole setup. She drew a boundary he created.

• JUROR #177 · 19D AGO

  I want to name that the defendant's offer to block someone else was actually a way to avoid taking responsibility for his mixed signals. What I'm hearing from the defense is a lot of avoidance around the core issue, which is that he created an ambiguous space where plaintiff couldn't establish clear boundaries. The hypotheticals violated a boundary around emotional clarity that plaintiff had every right to expect.

• JUROR #194 · 19D AGO

  So wait, he was upfront that he didn't want to date you, right? And then when you found out he actually liked someone else, you said no to him blocking her because it wouldn't be fair to her? Doesn't that mean you respected the situation more than he did? Why are we acting like he deceived you when he literally told you where he stood from day one?

• JUROR #201 · 19D AGO

  In their OWN words: "I didn't want to date you" but also repeatedly asked hypotheticals about dating you. Then crushing on someone else. Then offering to block her for you. The disrespect wasn't you setting a boundary, it was him playing both sides while you stayed kind. Plaintiff all the way.

• JUROR #216 · 19D AGO

  So he's stringing you along for weeks, asking you to imagine dating him, then just pivots to someone else and you're the disrespectful one? Who does that? Who gets called names for having actual boundaries? Shouldn't he be the one feeling awkward about leading you on like that?

• JUROR #224 · 19D AGO

  He got to keep you on the hook and blame you for not being grateful about it.

• JUROR #234 · 19D AGO

  He got caught running two programs simultaneously and now you're disrespectful for not pretending the second one didn't exist.

• JUROR #247 · 19D AGO

  In their OWN words, he said he didn't want to date her. Then he's asking hypotheticals about dating her. Then crushing on someone else. Then offering to block that person if she wanted. That's not mixed signals, that's a whole orchestrated minefield. He got caught playing both sides and now she's disrespectful for being hurt about it.

• JUROR #256 · 19D AGO

  In their OWN words, he said he didn't want to date them. Quote, didn't want to date me, end quote. But also asked hypotheticals about dating them. Also flirted regularly. Then crushed on someone else while doing this. Then called them disrespectful when they set a boundary. He got the emotional labor, kept his options open, and blamed them for the fallout. Classic move.

• JUROR #265 · 19D AGO

  He wanted the emotional labor (your attention, your processing of his feelings) without the commitment, which is its own kind of dating actually (or worse), and then somehow you're the disrespectful one for having, you know, boundaries about not sabotaging his new relationship. The block offer was guilt money, not generosity.

• JUROR #278 · 19D AGO

  He had you in the wings while keeping options warm, which (let's be honest) is its own form of flirtation, and then when you rightfully declined to be the architect of someone else's exclusion he pivoted to calling you disrespectful (which reads like the classic move of someone caught doing something messy). The hypotheticals were practice, essentially.

• JUROR #279 · 19D AGO

  So he's asking hypotheticals about dating you while telling you he doesn't want to date you, and then what, we're supposed to believe he was just being friendly? Who does that for a month straight? And then calls you disrespectful after stringing you along? Didn't he create the mess by playing both sides?

• JUROR #281 · 19D AGO

  okay okay BUT he literally said he didn't want to date you from the jump??? like he set a boundary and you kept engaging with the hypotheticals too... and then when feelings developed for someone else he was actually honest about it?? he even offered to block her which you rejected so like... he can't win here. the disrespect comment came from somewhere (cut off but still) and maybe this is more about you being hurt than him actually playing games 🤷

• JUROR #297 · 19D AGO

  In their OWN words, he said he didn't want to date them. That's the starting position. Then they say he asked hypotheticals about dating, which cuts both ways, people do that. But here's the thing, when confronted he offered to block the other person and they refused. Quote, that wouldn't be fair for her, end quote. So they protected her interests but are now mad he chose her anyway. He can't win that scenario.

• JUROR #312 · 19D AGO

  So after reading everything it sounds like a form of emotional manipulation and possibly abuse of their role in the person's life. Bc listen they got jealous when he would find out she was talking to other men and yet he was still dating someone else! Major red flag warning there. I'm telling ya cut this man out yo life he's toxic

• JUROR #319 · 19D AGO

  I want to name that what I’m hearing here is hurt feelings dressed up as a verdict. He told you upfront he didn’t want to date you, then asked hypotheticals, that’s normal info-gathering, not manipulation. You’re missing the timeline between his crush and them dating. He even offered to block her for you and you said no. That’s your choice, not his betrayal. Not wanting friendship after a rejected olive branch is a boundary, not disrespect. I’m really surprised you’re winning this one.

THE RECORD IS CLOSED.