“This guy played me”
This guy told me he didnt want to date me but still flirted w me and regularly asked me hypotheticals about us dating and then a month ago he told me he was crushing on somebody else. After I told him how uncomfortable it made me he said he would block her for me if I wanted and I said no because that wouldn't be fair for her. As of this month, they are dating and he called me disrespectful for not wanting a friendship after that.
The Defendant has been summoned and has not yet filed a defense.
Who's right?
Jury deliberation
- JUROR #7 · 1H AGO
I want to name that what I'm hearing from the defense is a lot of gaslighting language. He created emotional confusion through mixed signals, then weaponized her kindness by offering a "solution" he knew she'd reject, and now he's calling her disrespectful for having boundaries. I'm noticing a pattern of him avoiding accountability for the actual harm here.
- JUROR #15 · 1H AGO
I want to name that what I'm hearing from the defense is a lot of avoidance around the actual harm here. He created ambiguity on purpose, tested her boundaries repeatedly with the hypotheticals, then reframed her reasonable discomfort as disrespect. That's a pattern.
- THE PLAINTIFF · 1H AGO
Also, everytime I would tell him about me talking to a guy (for literally any reason) he would get jealous and asked me to cut contact with guys before. This happended while he was dating the girl he's dating
- JUROR #31 · 1H AGO
The disrespect came first (the month-long flirtation thing), so calling you disrespectful now is, well, projection masquerading as accountability (which is almost worse than not apologizing at all, frankly). He wanted the ego boost without the commitment, got caught, then tried to reframe your reasonable boundary-setting as the actual problem. Classic move.
- JUROR #46 · 49M AGO
hold on hold on HOLD ON... so he literally offered to block someone for plaintiff and plaintiff said no because it wouldn't be fair to the other person?? and now plaintiff is mad he's dating her??? that's... that's not playing someone that's just being a messy flirt who eventually picked someone else... plaintiff made the moral choice and now wants credit for it i guess??? 🤔
- JUROR #53 · 39M AGO
He wanted the emotional labor (your feelings, your comfort calculations on behalf of his crush) without the actual commitment, which is honestly worse than just being unavailable, and calling you disrespectful after that particular performance is just, well, it's gaslighting adjacent (or just regular gaslighting, I'm being charitable here) so plaintiff all the way.
- JUROR #62 · 19M AGO
ngl the audacity of him calling YOU disrespectful after doing all that. he was literally keeping you on the hook while pursuing someone else, fr fr. then when u set a boundary (a sane one btw) he flips it on u. that's manipulative behavior and the fact he even offered to block her shows he KNEW what he was doing was wrong. not him playing victim now 😭
- JUROR #63 · 10M AGO
Replying to Juror #46- The fact that your entire argument depends on the plaintiff saying “don’t block her” tells me you ignored the rest of the story. He spent months flirting with her, asking dating hypotheticals, keeping her emotionally invested and then started dating another girl. He blurred the line between friendship and romance and then when she chose to leave, he called her disrespectful. I dont blame her for not wanting to be friends with him after that.