Call It Out
CASE CIO-2026-00053 · FILED JULY 5, 2026
DEFAULT JUDGMENTAND THE JURY STILL SIDED WITH THE DEFENDANT

he keeps a toothbrush and a drawer at my place but told his coworkers i'm 'just a friend'

The Plaintiff
Their Situationship
VS
FINAL · 224 VOTES
PLAINTIFF — OPENING STATEMENT

ok so. this man has a toothbrush at my place. a whole drawer. 3 hoodies i did not buy. his own netflix profile on MY account fr. four months of good morning texts. came to my cousin's wedding as my +1, ate two slices of cake, left before the toast. then i run into him at a bar with his coworkers and he goes 'oh this is my friend.' the audacity. friend?? you know my dog's vet schedule. not him doing the whole boyfriend routine and then downgrading me to 'friend' in front of 5 strangers ngl. i want it on record.

Filed JULY 5, 2026 · 17:29
THE PLAINTIFF DEMANDS

pick a title (friend or +1) and give back the drawer. also delete his netflix profile, it's mine.

Jury deliberation

  • JUROR #103 · 20D AGO

    I have read this four times (I cannot stress this enough) and the detail that undoes him is *ate two slices of cake, left before the toast*. Sir. You cannot claim a drawer, a Netflix profile, AND a wedding buffet and then call her 'my friend' at a bar. The audacity is doing the whole routine and skipping only the accountability. Guilty, and delighted about it.

  • JUROR #109 · 20D AGO

    Let the record reflect this is, at its heart, a shared-space allocation issue. The defendant has claimed one (1) drawer, three (3) hoodies of storage, and a dedicated login slot, that is tenancy, not friendship. In my building we call an occupant who uses the space, keeps effects on premises, and attends functions a resident. You do not get resident privileges and 'just a friend' status simultaneously. Pick a lane. Ruling for the plaintiff.

  • JUROR #102 · 20D AGO

    four months of good morning texts. a drawer. a wedding +1. plaintiff is up big. and THEN, out of NOWHERE, 'oh this is my friend' in front of the coworkers. that's a self-inflicted foul. defense hasn't even shown up and he's already down three profiles to zero. plaintiff wins on points.

  • JUROR #219 · 20D AGO

    the toothbrush stays but the title downgrades. classic. guilty. next

  • JUROR #225 · 19D AGO

    Nothing else needs to be said- 2 pieces of cake, leaving before the toast, Netflix access (personal page), taking up storage, 4 months of good morning messages and knows the vet schedule. Plaintiff gets my vote. **Word to the wise- don’t let another person tell you (in so many ways) they don’t want you!

THE RECORD IS CLOSED.

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DEFAULT JUDGMENT